I went to Germany.

Hello, dear reader. It's been too long, but I'm back with vengeance to lay down the truths and the laws.

Let's be honest: I'm busy, you're busy, I don't want to type a lot, you don't want to read a lot. We're going to make this painless for all parties involved. I'll start:

Last week I went to:

• Germany

The transport I used to get there was:

• Bus

• Train

The cities I went to were:

• Hamburg

• Berlin

Things I saw were:

• The largest model train display on Earth

• A tea museum

• Art

• Old buildings

• Environmental things

Okay. That's the gist of this post. If you wanted the footnotes, there they are. I get it. For those of you who want more, I understand; it's easy to find one's self on the edge of your seat when dealing with matters "tea" and "art". The following is for you, edge-seat-sitter.

Let's break this down by city. Then by academic, cultural, and tourist subsets. Each has been handily labeled so you can skip what you find boring. Please enjoy!

Hamburg
March 4-6

I'll be honest, wasn't overly thrilled with this place. I don't want to rag on it though, it was probably just because it was cold and we spent a lot of time outside.

Academics

Day one we visited a place called HafenCity (Harbor City) that was essentially going through massive rezoning and construction to be a sustainable commercial and residential community. Also checked out the Municipality since Hamburg was voted Green Capital of the EU in 2011. Our final academic stop of Hamburg was Energy Mountain, a former landfill that was cleaned up and now is home to wind turbines and solar panels, powering roughly 40,000 residencies in the city.

Culture

The first night we had a traditional German dinner (read: meat and potatoes and beer). Please note: My skin is still purging all the unnecessary fats and greases from that night and I don't want to talk about it.

Do not ask me about this meal. Photo credit: Christian Graefe

 Tourist

While in Hamburg I went to the Miniatur Wunderland, a museum of very small things, which was pretty much 8 rooms filled with a giant model train. They say it was the biggest on Earth. I believe them. Also went to a World War II memorial at the site of a church that had been totally destroyed in Allied air raids circa 1943, save the bell tower which somehow survived. We went to the top of the tower which had been retrofitted with an elevator. Later I went to a tea museum and bought Pai Mu Tan White Tea. I have not yet tried it. Look at these pictures of all that stuff I just talked about:

Bald man included for scale.

Bird's eye view of Hamburg from aforementioned bell tower.

These tubes are filled with tea. I'm not sure what else you were expecting.

Berlin
March 6-9

Berlin was where it was at. We had an extra day to spend here, and it was much more of the European cultural epicenter that I expected to see.

 

Academics
We talked mostly to firms who aid and stimulate discussion between large corporations to encourage sustainability. I found some components interesting, but all in all they were very boring. I, therefore, won't perpetuate and extend this apathy to text form. I will tell you about a quaint community garden we went to that had opened its own café on site. It was also completely moveable; everything was planted in crates. This was in case they lost the land for some reason in the future. I enjoy the communal stuff much more than the business stuff. We also went to a sustainable community that's goal was to create a living, working, education, and recreation site all in one place. They had their own mini outdoor amphitheater, educational facilities, theater, bakery, etc. I dig.



Culture
I went to a couple museums, one of Greek and Roman architecture, and the other of art, with 19th century realism, impressionism, and romanticism. They were two of five museums on this small plot of land surrounded by water, aptly named Museum Island. I also got to go to the top of the Reichstag, the German Parliament building, see the city from one of its highest points there, and then eat a three-course meal. I accidentally had a small knife on me, which was briefly confiscated, but don't worry, I got it back afterwards. Security hassled me though. I remember learning about the place in 10th grade AP European History. CONNECTIONS.

Tourist
We went to the Holocaust Memorial, finished as recently as 2005. Also went on an "alternative walking tour" of the city where we saw a bunch of graffiti complaining about the rich and the government, etc. etc. Also got to walk along the remaining parts of the Berlin Wall. Other than that, see "Culture". These two really go hand-in-hand and should not be separated, but I'm too far along to want to go back and change anything. By the way, if you've read this far, let me know in a comment on here or on facebook, because that's just impressive, and I want you to understand my appreciation. It will be our little secret. But we can't have you just saying you read this far, because then fellow readers will be like, "Huh, what is this guy talking about with this comment?" and then go back and look for THIS VERY STATEMENT. So please, in your comment, after your remarks on how I'm a great writer, just give me your favorite number. Or any number, for that matter. Thanks so much. I admire you. Now look at this picture I took in Berlin:

The Reichstag. No, we're not in Mordor, it's just night.

I have nothing more to say. This was long. I'll aim not to put either of us through this again. Thank you.